This topic has come up more than any others in conversations with other moms of teens. I value the truth. Do you remember being their age? Man, I would not repeat those years. I was so insecure and had more questions than answers. I wondered how my parents were? How did they do at some of these temptations? I knew right from wrong. When everyone is doing this or that staying pure in actions seems old school or impossible. Parents just don’t understand!!!
A problem is parents tell kids what they want them to do, not how they navigated those rough waters. Kids ultimately want to please their parents. These youths are not perfect and neither are we.
I chose to share with my kids my flaws. I have told them things of which I was ashamed. I told stories that were hard to say. Not only did I state the facts, I added the emotional regret that comes with poor choices. This is a great segway to the Bible. Kids want to know why not just no.
There is a time and place to say “because I said so.” Not here. My children were at the edge of their seats when I shared my sin. I gave insight to excuses I made why it was okay. At this point, I share what God says and how His Word cannot only keep us pure but live a life with no regrets. Some things just can’t be undone. The open dialogue was a good foundation for the following years. Kids want our advice but they want to trust you to tell the truth. Respect goes both ways. I know it’s hard to see your sin through their eyes but you want to be their advocate, not their boss. Life is hard. We all need a soft place to fall.
